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1. Opening your windows- it doesn't matter the temperature of the day, even if it's cold open your windows for a few minutes and let in some fresh air. Air your little face breathe in some oxygen that hasn't been circulating around your room for 12 hours. I actually really love breathing in fresh air as it rains or after it's rained. Everything is washed and fresh, it's like everything is new. Newness and fresh starts are really important if you're trying to figure out your own feelings in your own head.
2. Drinking a lot of cold water- This is a weird one because y'know, you need water to live and stuff, but water is one thing that I, one: take for granted every single day, and 2: forget about. I so often forget to drinks and make myself tired and dehydrated and basically fizzle out. I never realised how much I really neglect just keeping my body hydrated and it honestly makes such a difference. When I make a conscious effort to sip water and keep a bottle near me (because c'mon, everyone hates that feeling that your body is sloshing because you downed a whole glass of water- it's better to sip) it improves my levels of energy and efficiency so much in whatever I'm doing.
3. Go for a long ass walk- Walking has always been my mother's remedy for stress relief when it came to me. During the last 3 years when I've had prety serious exams to pass I tend to get pretty damn anxious, I tend to not leave the house and end up gaining weight, losing sight of what is important and generall losing the will to live surrounded by notes and post its and cue cards and posters and... you get the idea. So, if she was home my mum would drag me out of the house for a "quick walk" to "get my circulation going" etc.
It was good for me on many levels, firstly because it allowed me to experience the outside world, two it meant some of the weight I was gaining could be lost in a productive and non-damaging way from my body, thirdly walking always clears my head. Also, I cannot emphasise enough the quality of fresh air and the positive affect it seems to have on me. I never tend to end walks feeling worse, I feel better and brighter. My mum calls it "brushing the cobwebs away", and really that's what it is. Ideas and thoughts and systems in my brain that are kind of stale get a tidy up, the cobwebs and unnecessary junk gets blown away in the wind and my mind is kind of cleaner by the end of it. Mother nature, my personal mental cleaning lady.
The pace at which I walk is usually a pretty good indicator as to how I'm doing: when I walk super slow it's usually because I'm exhausted or just generally don't want to be somewhere (that's usually how I start walks) if I'm walking super fast I'm anxious as hell and trying to work out a zillion things at once- if m pace is slow and steady I tend to be my most productive, making mental lists, taking things literally and metaphorically one step at a time. I think it's really important for me personally to keep that kind of steady pace in the way that I walk. think and generally live my life.
4. Catch up with someone you love. Okay, with this little pick-me-up comes a word of caution. The idea of catching up with someone you love is totally great, chatting, maybe getting things off our chest, discussing life and having a positive experience in general. However it can sometimes be easier said that done. Sometimes people who suffer with anxiety or depression, or for that matter any other kind of mental illness can find their own thoughts and mindset hugely isolating. Things and people lose their appeal and the habit of shrinking away from interaction becomes a norm. Breaking out of this mindset, talking and communicating is so healthy for your own well being. I tend to like quickly messaging my best friend on Facebook or a text or something but sometimes I also like to email my Grandma- I know I'm a baby. But I love my Grandma insane amounts, she's a hilarious and lovely lady and I know she likes to hear from me. I just send her updates about my life and ask her about hers, she lives across the world so it is really important and really nice for us to stay in touch like that. Again doing that makes me feel grounded and the interaction makes me feel wanted and also gives me perspective.
Sometimes though, it's hard because people do not seem to have the time, they're busy or doing something else, caught up in their own lives. It is easy to feel hurt or brushed aside when people don't seem to have the time for you and to that I say two things. Firstly, do not be hurt if someone can't interact with you right when you want them to. I know, you need consolation or affection, you want a quick fix of human interaction to make you feel like you belong and you exist and you are recognised, that is normal.
But sometimes people really may not be able to talk or pause for you right when you want them to- everyone has their own lives and they may need their own time, but that does not mean that they do not care for you and does not mean they will not help you when they can. Secondly, good positive people in your life who make you stronger and lift you up will make time for you. Whether that be dropping what they are doing to speak to you or hang out, or telling you "I can't talk right now" but then making plans to be there for you when they can. People who do not make the effort for you in any way at any time are likely to be negative and toxic people in your life, and let's face it, with the state of the world and our minds the way they are, who need negative energy bringing them down and making them feel alone? Not you.
5. Fresh sheets- these are my ultimate ready made happiness. Fresh sheets straight out of the dryer made up properly on our bed are an ideal way to be as supremely comfortable as is humanely possible. Not only will they feel great, they will smell great too, and you're a lot likelier to get a better nights sleep in a bed you're comfortable in.
6. Mindfulness breathing- I discovered mindfulness some time last year when my anxiety was really at it's very worst. I didn't personally want to resort to pills or even therapy although I do completely value it's advantages and would completely support a persons decision to try either in order to get their head in a better place. I will write a post about mindfulness and the way I use it in my life another time because honestly I could yack on about it for hours. What I mean by mindful bre\thing is kind of like meditation. I take 5, 10, 30 minutes out of my day, however much I need, I take the time to sit and kind of meditate. I usually use a quieter space where I'm by myself and make myself really really aware of how I feel physically.
I sit in a comfortable position and just breathe, I don't let myself think of a single thing that would bother me and just really focus on individual parts of me. How me toes feel on the floor, the temperature of my arms, the weight of my shoulders. (Stretching anything tat is tense and held really helps with the process too.) I do this for long enough for my heart rate to slow down, my skin to get less hot and my head to prioritise what actually matters. I find it a really helpful thing for avoiding panic attacks especially, it just makes you aware of your physical position. During panic attacks people can experience things different depending on the severity of the panic attack, symptoms can vary:
- Shortness of breath or hyperventilation.
- Heart palpitations or a racing heart.
- Chest pain or discomfort.
- Trembling or shaking.
- Choking feeling.
- Feeling unreal or detached from your surroundings.
I find mindfulness can really help you avoid reaching the point of a panic attack and also allowing yourself to be brought back down from one too. Mindfulness just slows everything down, lets everything return to normal again.
6. Escapism using the internet, ie: YouTube. Okay, this is again another technique for finding a little pleasant space and peace that I would advocate but with caution. When dealing with a negative mindset and energy in your life it can be really helpful, as well as a bit of a reality check, to use a little escapism. The internet if perfect for this, and especially youtube. YouTube stars have really made it big in recent years as the platform continues to grow and develop into something new and innovative, inspiration and influential. From a young age I found a lot of comfort in watching Vlogs, people like Zoella, Sprinklofglitter, PointlessBlog and Caspar Lee were staples of my tween years, and I never really grew out of enjoying vlogs.
Currently I absolutely adore watching the Michalack's Sunday vlogs- Stef and Hannah and their baby Grayson just have a weekly vlog that they put together completely beautifully, complete with silky montages and glorious music every Sunday and for some reason this beautiful little family's weekly world makes me feel so calm when I watch. I think it gives me perspective on my own life, as well as additions to my Spotify playlists... My little Sunday night routine after a stressful week and thinking about the Monday ahead has been, for a while now, settling down at night in bed with a nice drink and watching the Sunday vlog before I go to bed. It puts me in a good mood, it always has a good message, and they are just always done so well- you can tell the amount of work and passion that gets put into the videos and the appreciation Stef and Hannah have for what they do and the platform they have. I may even have to write a blog post about these beautiful creatures soon, but also I don't want to look like a weird stalker girl and write about this little family too much either!
Escapism is not always a good thing though, and like everything else in life needs to be done in moderation. Using YouTube as an outlet or for inspiration or comfort is in no way a bad thing, and so many people use it for such. But an overattachment or obsession is totally unhealthy. There is no way that fans or viewers can live vicariously through their favourite youtubers. it's impossible and irrational and it's also just not very healthy to be obsessed with how other people live their lives because you forget to live your own. I guess what I'm trying to say is escapism is good in small doses but in large quantities it can be destructive because you can lose yourself in the midst of your great escape from reality.
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